Never Again
by pikagurl23
Summary: After a heart shattering break up, will Ash discover that his true love is closer than he thinks? AAML


Disclaimer: Don't own pokemon!  
  
A/N: Okay, this fic is based on one of my favorite songs called 'Never Again' by Justin Timberlake (all rights reserved, of course) and it's in Ash's POV. Hope you all like it!  
  
Ages:  
  
Ash: 21  
  
Misty: 20  
  
Tracey (not the Tracey from the Orange Islands; this one's a female): 21  
  
Never Again  
  
I looked down at the tiny town in which I called my home. The lights from each of the homes sparkled like a festival of fireflies on a mid-summers night. The moon was shining brightly, illuminating the sea that flowed behind me. Although it seemed my eyes were scanning over the scenic view, my mind was elsewhere.  
  
It had happened several hours ago, although it felt like mere minutes to me. The one girl that I thought I loved completely dumped me for my rival, Gary Oak. I remember each sentence, each word, and each emotion she expressed as she unexpectedly broke my heart in two.  
  
***  
  
"I can't believe you!" Yelled Tracey, my girlfriend of four years.  
  
"Listen, I tried my best. I really did." I protested, trying to get her to calm down.  
  
"Well, it wasn't good enough, was it Ash?" She spat out in pure anger. Never in my life had I seen her so angry at me. Her eyes were filled with rage as she glared at me menacingly.  
  
"Look, I'm sorry, but I didn't want to put Pikachu's life in danger." I explained, referring to a battle that had only concluded about an hour ago.  
  
"Don't I mean anything to you anymore?" She asked with pleading eyes.  
  
"Of course you do. You know I love you." I told her.  
  
"Apparently, not enough." She countered, turning her back towards me. "If you really loved me then you would've won that match."  
  
"But, I-I tried…" I stuttered, worried about what was going to happen next.  
  
"No! You didn't do anything!" She screamed, picking up a newspaper. She pointed to a familiar face on the front page, known to everyone as Gary Oak, the pokemon master. "He tried! And he won too! He's a real man, not a loser like you!"   
  
I closed my eyes and let everything she told me sink in. "Trace, I-I'm sorry. Please don't leave me…" I begged.  
  
"Forget it, Ash! We're through! I can't believe I ever loved you!" She yelled as she harshly slapped my cheek and then stormed out of the house.  
  
I gently touched my stinging cheek as fresh tears started to come to the corner of my eyes. I took a seat on my couch and stared into nothingness. All of a sudden, I could hear soft footsteps coming down the staircase, but I didn't bother to look up.  
  
Seconds later, I felt a tiny paw on my right shoulder. I turned to see my best friend and first pokemon, Pikachu. It was giving me a sympathetic look and licked my cheek to show its affection.   
  
"Pikachu?" It asked, obviously worried about my state of mind.  
  
"I'm fine buddy. Don't worry about me." I replied, wiping a few of my tears away and standing up. "I'm just going to go for a little walk to clear my head."  
  
"Pika pikachu?" It asked, jumping to its feet.  
  
"No, that's okay. You stay here and rest, its been a long day for the both of us." I sighed, turning towards the door.  
  
"Pika pi…pika pikachu chu pi pikachu." I stopped in my tracks as Pikachu spoke to me. "Pikachu pika pika chu pi pika pikachu chu."  
  
I nodded as I thought about Pikachu's words. "Thanks buddy." I smiled as I left my home.  
  
***  
  
And here I am now, atop a cliff looking over my beloved town and thinking about what Pikachu had told me.  
  
'No girl is worthy of your heart unless they hold the key to unlock it.' I repeated this over and over again in my head, trying to figure out how Pikachu came up with such sayings. My thoughts also surrounded the second thing that Pikachu pointed out. 'If you two really and truly loved each other, then you'd be hurting a lot more than you are now.'  
  
But how could Pikachu truly know how I was feeling? I was hurting more than I ever thought possible. Even when I was journeying with Misty and Brock, I never hurt this much. So, what did Pikachu really mean?  
  
As I walked along the road leading out of my hometown, I recalled many memories of when I first started out. I thought about every single event, from the day Misty fished me out of that river, to the day we parted ways. Although I still kept in touch with her, that separation affected all of us, most of all me.  
  
I continued to walk along the dark road, thinking to myself. How could everything go spiraling out of control in such a short amount of time? This is the kind of stuff that only happened in soap operas, not in real life and especially not to me. I sighed to myself, realizing that I would probably never see Tracey again. Either that, or the next time I saw her would most likely be in Gary's arms. How could I have been so stupid?  
  
Looking up at the star filled sky, something caught my eye. It was a shooting star, so I slowly closed my eyes and made a wish, knowing that it probably wouldn't come true.  
  
"Please…lead me back to the one I love." I sighed.  
  
As I made that wish, I made a vow to myself. Never again would I make the same mistake twice.  
  
'Would have given up my life for you,  
  
guess it's true what they say about love... it's blind.  
  
Girl you lied straight to my face,   
  
looking in my eyes.   
  
And I believed you cause I loved you more than life.  
  
And all you had to do was apologize.  
  
You didn't say you're sorry,  
  
I don't understand.  
  
You don't care that you hurt me,  
  
and now I'm half the man,  
  
that I used to be when it was you and me.  
  
You didn't love me enough.  
  
My heart may never mend and you'll never get to love me again.   
  
Sadness has me at the end of the line.  
  
Helpless watched you break this heart of mine.  
  
And loneliness only wants you back here with me.  
  
Common sense knows that you're not good enough for me.  
  
And all you had to do was apologize and mean it.  
  
But you didn't say you're sorry,  
  
I don't understand.  
  
You don't care that you hurt me,  
  
and now I'm half the man,  
  
that I used to be when it was you and me.  
  
You didn't love me enough.  
  
My heart may never mend and you'll never get to love me…  
  
Wish like hell I could go back in time.  
  
Maybe then I could see how…  
  
Forgiveness says that I should give you one more try,  
  
but it's too late,  
  
it's over now.  
  
You didn't say you're sorry,  
  
I don't understand.  
  
You don't care that you hurt me,  
  
and now I'm half the man,  
  
that I used to be when it was you and me.  
  
You didn't love me enough.  
  
My heart may never mend and you'll never get to love me... again.   
  
Again, yeah, yeah.  
  
Again, again, again, yeah, yeah, yeah.  
  
Never get to love me…'  
  
(Never Again-Justin Timberlake)  
  
Soon after making my wish, I stopped by the river bed and sat on a rock. I watched as the waterfall to my right sprayed mist in every direction. As I continued to watch the river, something caught my eye. A rock was being skipped across the river by someone sitting to my far left that I hadn't even noticed before. It was too dark to see a face, but I could definitely tell that it was a girl. She threw another rock into the river, which skipped six times.   
  
"Nice one." I said looking at her.  
  
She quickly whipped her head around to face me. Her face was still hidden in the shadows, but I could tell that she was looking me over. After a long silence, she finally spoke.  
  
"Ash?"  
  
The young girl moved out of the shadows so I could see her more clearly. She had long flowing red hair and cerulean blue eyes. I instantly recognized her.  
  
"Misty? What are you doing out here at this hour? Don't you know it's dangerous after dark?" I smiled, letting myself forget about all of the events of the day.  
  
"Well, it's nice to see you too, Ash." She smiled sarcastically. "If you must know, I like to come here to think."  
  
"At this hour?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Okay then, what are you doing here?" She asked, folding her arms.  
  
"Uh…just…thinking…" I replied quietly.  
  
"Oh really? At this hour?" She mocked, laughing to herself. I joined in her laughter, realizing that it was the first time I had laughed like this in a long time.  
  
"So, is this your thinking spot then?" I asked after the laughter had subsided.  
  
"I guess you could say that. It's my favorite spot." She sighed.  
  
"And why is that?" I smiled, knowing how she'd react.  
  
"Ash! How could you forget!? This is the place--"  
  
"Where we first met, I know, I know. I'm just kidding." I smiled. "How could I forget?"  
  
"So, anyway, why'd you come here?" She asked. Upon hearing her question, my mind started to drift back to what had happened earlier. I looked down at the ground, ashamed to tell her the truth. "Ash? Is something wrong?"  
  
I nodded slowly as she suddenly stood up.  
  
"Why don't you come on back to my house and I'll make you a cup of coffee. It looks like you need it." She said, extending her hand to me. I took it and stood up without another word.  
  
Several minutes later, I found myself amidst the residents of Cerulean City. We made our way to Misty's house in silence as the gym finally came into view. Misty let me in and led me to her living room.  
  
"I'll be right back with our drinks." She smiled, exiting the room.  
  
I looked around at my surroundings and noticed several pictures from when I was on my journey. I took a closer look and smiled, seeing how happy we were back then. There were no complications, no problems, nothing. We all lived care-free lives, not even thinking twice about the opposite sex, well, except for Brock.  
  
Misty had re-entered the room with two mugs. She handed me one as we both sat down on her couch.  
  
"Thanks."   
  
"No problem." She smiled. "So, what's up Ash?"  
  
I shook my head as I stared into my cup. "Everything." I sighed. "How about you?"  
  
"About the same for me too." She sighed, taking a sip of her coffee.  
  
"Oh, how are you and Jonathan?" I asked, referring to her newest boyfriend.  
  
"It didn't work out." She said simply.  
  
"I'm sorry to hear that." I said, guessing how she was probably feeling.  
  
"Don't be, I'm fine. I realized that I wasn't really in love with him. That's why it doesn't hurt so much." She explained.  
  
"I don't mean to be nosey or anything, but when did you realize that you didn't love him?" I asked.  
  
"To be truthful with you, I don't really know. It just sort of happened." She replied. "So, I told him how I felt and he said that he felt the same, so we ended it." She paused for a moment to consider her words and then continued. "I told him that I was really in love with someone else."  
  
"Who?" I inquired.  
  
"Just a really good friend of mine who has no idea of my feelings for him." She answered.  
  
"Oh, well, good luck with him. I hope everything works out." I smiled.  
  
"Thanks…I hope so too." She said, smiling back at me. "So, now that you're all caught up on what I've been doing, what's wrong with you?" She asked, looking in my direction.  
  
I just shook my head, not knowing how to start. "Tracey…she-she broke up with me this afternoon." I sighed, putting my mug on the table.  
  
"Oh Ash, I'm so sorry to hear that. I know how much you cared about her." She said.  
  
"I not only cared about her…I loved her." I said softly, putting my head in my hands. Once again, my tears started to slowly trickle down my face. But, all of a sudden, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw Misty shooting me a sympathetic look. "What am I going to do without her?" I asked as Misty engulfed me in a tight hug and comfortingly rubbed my back.  
  
"It's going to be okay, Ash. Do you hear me? You're going to make it through this, I know you will." She whispered in my ear. "Why did she leave you anyway?"  
  
I wiped the tears away and faced her.  
  
"The fifth round of the Indigo League was today. I told her that I would win for her, but I ended up losing." I explained. "She was furious with me when we got home. She said that I just wasn't strong enough."  
  
"Ash, that's ridiculous." She started. "How could you even listen to her? You are one of the strongest people I know."  
  
"But, she said--"  
  
"Forget what she said. That's all bullshit. You know it and I know it. She's the one that's weak." She told me firmly. Upon hearing this, I looked into her eyes, wondering if what she was telling me was true. As if sensing my doubt, Misty spoke up. "And I mean every word of that."  
  
I smiled at her as a single tear fell from my cheek. "You know, you're the only one who really understands me."  
  
"I know. It kind of scares me." She smiled. I laughed at her remark and engulfed her in a hug.  
  
"Thanks Mist." I whispered.  
  
"Anytime. You know you can talk to me about anything." I nodded at her as I released her. "I'm just happy to see that genuine Ash Ketchum smile again."  
  
I laughed again as I ruffled up her hair. "What about that genuine Misty temper?" I asked.  
  
"Hey, watch yourself." She smiled, pointing a finger at me.  
  
It was then, at that exact moment, that a strange feeling came over me. It was tugging at my heart and telling me to follow this feeling. It was something I had never experienced before.  
  
"Ash, what's wrong?" I heard Misty ask.  
  
"Nothing." I replied, rubbing my chest.  
  
There it was! It happened again. It was that same feeling. But what was it? All of a sudden, it hit me. Any feelings that I previously had for Tracey were gone. I didn't hurt anymore. My thoughts then drifted back to what Pikachu had said earlier. 'If you two really and truly loved each other, then you'd be hurting a lot more than you are now.' Then that means I never loved her? If that wasn't love, then I don't know what is…or maybe I do…  
  
"I think I just discovered something." I announced softly.  
  
"What's that?" She asked.  
  
"Maybe…if I searched my heart, deep down I don't think I really, truly loved her. I think I just told myself that I did because I felt pressured. But, what really scares me is that the whole time we were together, I think I was really in love with someone else." I finished.  
  
Misty stared at me intently, listening to my every word. And, it was at that instant that I knew who I had fallen for. And now, I needed to make my feelings known.  
  
"Misty…" I whispered.  
  
"Yes Ash?"   
  
"I...I think that all along…I was really in love with you." I breathed, uncertain of how she would react. I mean, she had been my best friend for nearly eleven years and to just automatically announce such strong feelings was so overwhelming.  
  
Before I knew it, Misty had brought her hand up to my cheek and lightly touched it. Then, she slowly lifted her head up as I instinctively brought mine down, entranced by her eyes. Our lips lightly touched as the most amazing feeling surged through me. All the emotion, all the love, and all the passion that we held for one another was released in one single kiss that seemed to last forever. As we broke away, Misty breathlessly fell into my open arms. Everything was happening so quickly, but for some reason, it felt right.  
  
Just then, she looked up at me and gave me a light smile.   
  
"But, I thought you had fallen--"  
  
"For you." She interrupted. "I was talking about you Ash. Now, who was that person that you claimed you loved?"  
  
"I'll show you." I whispered as I bestowed another gentle kiss upon her. When we released, I looked at her longingly. "I love you, Mist."  
  
"I love you too." She whispered back, tears filling her eyes.  
  
"Hey, what's wrong?" I asked, wiping away her tears.  
  
"It's just that…I never thought it was possible that I was the girl that would be the key to your heart." She whispered.  
  
I thought about her words and realized that Pikachu was right all along. Misty was the only girl who could ever affect me the way she did, she was the only one who would ever hold that special place in my heart. And, oddly enough, Tracey was the cause of that. If it wasn't for her rejection, I would have never told Misty how I truly felt about her. And for that, I'm grateful to her. From that moment on, I knew that I would never again fall for another girl.  
  
A/N: Sorry if this story was a little fast for some of you (or if the plot completely sucked). Anyway, review, do whatever. Thanks guys! AAML forever! 


End file.
